Archive for the 'I Enjoy Nurturing The Delicate Bud Of Friendship' Category

For Your Consideration

Dear readers, I so rarely make suggestions as to how you should live your life.

Except that if it doesn’t include Bare Escentuals makeup and Brookstone nap socks and La Mer body creme and Real Simple magazine and Crate and Barrel sea salt caramels and Cakebread chardonnay and Big Sexy shampoo (yes, despite the awful name) then what kind of life is it, really?

Anyway, now I’m recommending a person to you. Go read my (real life) friend Kate’s blog. It’s sharp, funny, and sure to be a hit at Sundance. You will thank me.

Still need convincing?

Bored back home over Christmas, homegirl entered a gingerbread house contest, and then toiled away to contribute a gingerchurch. And won! A poignant comment on cultural pandering and the stunning naivete of Southern Bible thumpers. Also: edible!

Suck+it,+old+ladies!

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What Christmas Is All About

When a friend invited me to his work holiday party, I thought, “Meh.” Then he told me that it was going to be at a hotel in Boston and that he’d pay for my drinks all night. Then I thought, “My friends are really, really important to me.”

Turns out there’s nothing like a fun, schmancy, boozy party on a Wednesday night to, well, make you want to die when you wake up after four hours of sleep on Thursday morning. But! It also makes for an unexpectedly fabulous way to spend an evening that would otherwise be pretty unmemorable.

It started with a 72-year-old cab driver who rambled on about electric typewriters, and then when he let me off, he said, “You must be so sad that you haven’t experienced as much of life as me.” Hmmm. Thanks for that, Wilford Brimley. Now give me some of the melted butterscotches in your coat pocket already.

At the beginning of the night, the CEO gave a lovely presentation and handed out awards, during which I threw back chardonnay and clapped for people I’d never see again (“We really COULDN’T do any of this without you, Eva Brown! You take that Mastercard gift card and enjoy every last bit of it, girl!”). Then, later in the night, the CEO sat down with my friend and I and did some tipsy talking about how it’s hard to be the CEO, no one feels like they can talk to the CEO, and that people think that just because she’s the CEO that she’s not a regular person. Since she was my friend’s boss I smiled empathetically (it’s hard to get cell reception in an ivory tower, after all) and didn’t slap her upside the head and ask if she had anything else to say aside from incessant acronym repeating.

The music! After the awards presentation they kicked things off with Let’s Get Loud, also known as the song they play in radio commercials for the club Tequila Rain, which my club-going friend Jen told me she felt too old for when she was 23. And it wasn’t a fluke; the rest of the night was a showcase of dirty Brazilian dance music. I haven’t seen anything that fantastic since the wedding I went to couple years ago where they immediately followed the hava nagila with SexyBack.

We left around 10:30 and stopped into the downstairs bar for “one more drink.” Two hours later we were deep in conversation with a consultant from Deloitte who was in his 40s and in town from Chicago. At first we just exchanged pleasantries and then left him alone with his laptop and draft beers, but he kept leaning back over to us and asking to hear more about whatever ridiculous dating situation he overheard us discussing. If that was what he was in the mood to hear, man, did he pick the right seat.

Anyway, it was a great night, capped off by a work day during which the most discipline that I exerted was, “Quiet voices, guys. Miss Reddington’s head hurts.”

I Can’t Decide If I’m A Better Friend Or Negotiator

Steve: Do you want to meet up somewhere halfway between us and have lunch?
Me: Mmm…no.
Steve: No?
Me: I don’t want to get dressed today.
Steve: Ha, okay.
Me: I have an idea!
Steve: What?
Me: Maybe you could come here and help me put up my Christmas tree!
Steve: Isn’t your Christmas tree in your attic?
Me: Yes.
Steve: In pieces?
Me: Yes.
Steve: Well…
Me: I have seasonal beer! And Hershey kisses! And I’ll make you dinner!
Steve: Hmm, okay. It might take me awhile to get there with all the traffic today, though.
Me: Could you stop along the way and get white lights? And ornaments?
Steve: What?
Me: I’m just kidding. Except about the lights.